NEED TO UPDATE !!

Currently almost bed-ridden, fever go away please, thank you !

Li Kai

"Awhh sorry i was sleeping.

Noe why? Cos

:P haih u shudnt stay at home.

Go out, do things, compose songs :)"

Thanks for the text, the only person I can share anything with; you're a gem.

I'm A Bad Boy

For breaking her heart.

Hi.

I'm nervous like faeces ):

Two weeks, two weeks, two weeks...

I'll be fine, I'll sail through the rainbows with success, right?

Omgoodness ):

Argh.

):

Bye.

The Swing In Your Step

Hello there. This is a message to you, and a reminder to myself, that my Final Exams are creeping up the calendars of my soul, so maybe if my soul survives the next two weeks, I'll be back here, as loyal and as acutely emotional as ever.

I'm emotional again. Yeah I know, I know, why did I let curiosity get the better of me? Just a miniscule amount of extra knowledge kills the many cells respiring inside of me. I may have trust issues, but for someone with frustrating inconspicuousness to be so blatant at times just throws me off the tight rope I've been learning to walk. In the very depth of happiness I've been living in, this lack of balance transitions my pain right from the negative mark to it's infinite height, right past the 'happiness' scale.

I can't do this ): I'm sick of pretense. But I know glue of it's strongest kind yet will never fail this... this thing.

Yeap, I've summed it all up in one word: Thing.

Enough crapping.

Well, adieu.

See you in a fortnight. Send me your best wishes, heehee.

Lotsa Love.

Alguien Soy Yo

Songwriters: Shanks, John; Dioguardi, Kara; Iglesias, Enrique M

Listen, please.

Inches from my fingertips...

you're inches from my fingertips
i've come as close as i can get
i'm reaching but the rest is up to you.
cause i don't ever wanna miss
being here with you like this
i'm trying but it's all that i can do.
i'm reaching but the rest is up to you..

and you say, so you say
it's a brilliance meant to fade
love is wild like a fire
burning underneath the rain
but this is not the same...

EMPTY promises.

I've had just about enough.

No, I'm not oblivious to things you never brought up, I pretend not to see certain things but honestly, it eats away a little part of me everyday.

And I've kept it all in.

I guess you've decided to bring it all up now.

Well, thank you for convincing me that once again, I am such a gullible, stupid person.

Jeon once told me, 'You can't be so nice, Adeline, you'll only let other people bully you so easily.' Hell and I laughed as if it was a ginormous joke.

If Karma Doesn't Hit You, I will.

Heyyy all (: It has been quiet I know; I'm sorry!

One huge week has been lifted off my small shoulders and I can breathe for, well, at least a day or two. Then it's right back to Finals. That's right, exams. We're students, our job is to study, I think all youngsters needa learn to accept that. And I need to learn to raise that self-esteem of mine =/

It's amazing isn't it, September going on October. There are times when I want to be Iceman, shoot ice over everything. Then the whole world can freeze - encased in solid water blocks, and I'll have the liberty to look all around, let day-by-day issues and revelations sink in, inhale and exhale until my pulse becomes regular and my nerves are relaxed, list the missed opportunities out, weep over those missed opportunities then get over them, and when i'm finally ready, snap my fingers and let life continue its course.

Anyway, what's new with me?

Nothing !

This year has been like any other, mostly home. But I've got music to save me, sighhh, I love music it's true. (:

And somebody dedicated this song to me, cheesy as it is, I am one of the universe's top most incurable romantic anyway.

When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
'Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile
The whole world stops and stares for a while
'Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are...

Sigh someone slap me in the face, please? (;

I know your secret...

Question.

Question: Ever wondered why some people take the simplest, and purest pleasure in watching the setting sun, although it is actually an implication that the day is over and darkness will reign?

Answer: Because while we can find joy in the brightness of life, happiness comes, and goes; Sorrow will take over, and it will go. It's inevitable. So why not live in every moment, every second, instead of dwelling on the black of night that will have to arrive; on the future that will have to happen...

"Arguably the best place to live in." Sigh.

#6 - Follow Me.

I mean it, literally. *executes a puss-in-boots-from-shrek look* (:

With Google Analytics, I've discovered that people from across the globe visit my site; the United States having the lion's share of them hits.

Unexpected, yes no? Yes. I guess the people you have acquaintances with always try to relate all that you say to what they think they've known you as over the years, (arrr what a hideously long string of words) so when they successfully fail to fathom your inner expression, they disregard your tripe talk. Others however, do not recognize you but when they discover similarities or a sense of connection, your gibberish suddenly makes sense. Or something like that.

But... Fact of life. Another justification as to why relevant individuals absolutely adore their pen pals. Or, again, something like that.

Thank you to the two followers I don't personally know (: One took an extra step with a comment here:

http://tryaliltenderness.blogspot.com/2010/07/crass.html

(: (: How humbling.

Uncle Kracker - Follow Me (; Cutesy guitar-ing.

How Far?

How far do I have to look beneath the layers, to discover what was overlapped...

When what overlapped is all I want to recognize.

How long do I have to remain one point shy, to hide behind secrets I have already uncovered...

When the uncovering of what I uncovered will leave me with a negative score.

How many degrees of truth must I swallow, to live in false regard...

When the lies are to a zero degrees, but the situation is as temperate as the North Pole.

Why can't things be simpler?

Because everyone has asked the same thing before, and simple is as simple never gets.

BITE ME.

*picture dramatic dropped-jaw, shocked expression*

WRITING DIDN'T HELP EASE ANYTHING OFF FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER.

I... lost the flow midway, and pushed the guitar away.

WHAT IS HAPPENING. WHAT IS HAPPENINGGGGG ?

Artsy.

Tonight I'm feeling somewhat galvanized...

The past few weeks have been loaded, and yet somehow I dug my way through the sticky grains of malevolence, all because of a particular... well should I say miracle?

And yet the miracle feels misplaced. My sub-conscience says miracles can go out of line, and I'm starting to believe that.

This is all too conflictual for me.

My tired mind is not up for anything like that, or rather, anything at all.

Ahhh I feel the song constructing. I'm embedding every emotion I've tried to explain in this post, into it. Some things are not meant to be understood. But see, told you I'm feeling inspired (: Off to write.

I'm not meant to be understood.

Bummer

aseriesofserendipities-tumblr_kvinqiraAn1qasir3o1_500

No I will not bawl my eyes out.

But I thought, you know, 'At long last, my chance has arrived.'

The RESPECT mini-concert just got cancelled, axed along with the two singing numbers I had begun to conquer and be immensely fond of.

I've always wanted to well, express that little bit of thing I enjoy doing... I've only never got the opportunity. Practices have been running pretty okay, and I've gotten to know at least five new REALLY pleasant people. By pleasant I mean, they share similar interests and have such likable personalities. I've thoroughly enjoyed those few sessions with you guys. (:

Additionally, my character particularly and always, controls me from blowing my own trumpet, but the few of them actually remarked that I can do what I do... And those comments were exactly what I needed to push that self-confidence meter of mine up to a 30% - from what used to be maybe just 5%.

Sigh Sigh Sigh I'm out of words and the strength to be disappointed.

I suppose I will never ever be able to grab the spotlight, not even for once in my restricted lifetime.

):

I need a hug.

Even the coldest winter have not the ability to dampen my all-time dream like this has.

):

Hug, please?

A Leader, A Friend.

(I searched up all my photo folders, but I couldn't find a picture of just

the two of us alone. Hence, I resorted to this instead.)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY !

I'm not about to disclose your age for the public to see, so no worries. The conjoined pictures above however, were individually snapped in our second year of leadership. (Oh goodness, schooling days!)

Might I add, though I've mentioned it before, that YOU were indeed, by far, the greatest leader I've met.

Because I don't wish to sound repetitive, I'll remind you of the person you were before we parted ways - as friends do from time to time, flowing with the course of life.

This is extracted from my previous blog, and it very clearly portrays what I thought of you then, and what you still probably are now (I haven't seen you in what feels like, millenniums sigh)

" Mr. Can-Do-Everything. Except laugh out loud.

Mr. Excited-When-I-Am-Sharing-Knowledge. So noble.

Mr. Responsible-And-Wise. An infinitely competent Head Prefect.

Mr. Righteous. Morally sound.

Mr. Certainly-Deserved-The-Huge-Slices-Of-Cake. There's always more.

I summed up the wholesome person you've become into five simple lines.

(: "

It's funny how I know I'll always remember you by those very few lines. (Though the cake bit was only relevant back then !)

Thank you for being the friend who gave me sound advice when certain times were rough, I'm sure you still remember when.

Have a very, very, blessed year ahead. (:

PS. This wish was published a day later than your actual birthdate, but if you observe the date of the post, it would be precise because it was correctly drafted on the 13th of August. I happened to fall asleep before clicking publish, yeah at 11.00 pm *gasp so early* on my bed with the lights on. Heehee (:

PPS. I hope you'll actually read this. *Edit: YOU DID ! Happy, I am (:

Trust... but first, verify.

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

Marilyn Monroe

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3042/2657138987_d6e537e9e2.jpg

Histrionics repeats itself.

Conscience: Don't start anything you can't finish.

Me: I know I know I know ):

Conscience: What's your plan?

Me: I don't know I don't know I don't know ):

Conscience: All these contradictory responses are self-induced, you know.

Me: I know I know I know.

Conscience: So just let go, silly.

Me: Oh. I... don't know...

Conscience: You and your endless, unnecessary contrition.

Me: ...

Conscience: I can't help you with your tender issues.

Me: Might as well be estranged huh.

Conscience: Ah, don't be like that. There are many other ways... i'm sure...

Me: Like?

Conscience: I can't help you, remember?

Me: Right, right... I can't help me.

Yes, check, no, check.

Crass.

I. AM. EMOTIONAL. TO. THE. HIGHEST. DEGREE.

I NEED TO YELL, but not when the sound may escape and wake the entire house.

HELLO, BLOG, CAN YOU HEAR ME?

How often is it that profanity wishes to leech on me and overpower my usually self-controlled tongue? Not frequent. But when it does, I could seriously. Kick. Everything. Within. My. Reach.

I am distraught - bothered - apprehensive - afraid - concerned - fretful... aren't all that enough to cause my chest to explode? I'm not an overflowing river, I'm the damned maremoto.

>:(

tumblr_kswjl1FOEu1qa9tnao1_500_large

The subject? Myself, actually. Help.

Flicker, flicker.

You're out drinking.

I am worried as hell.

Please be careful.

And you, you're out, doing shisha. Do you really think some trends are worth following, just to portray that badass side of you? Your maturity level amazes me. And eats away what's left of the respect you've earned from me.

You ARE drunk. You're telling me how to 'preserve my virginity'. I like how for that moment you thought so little of me. Or was that you caring for me genuinely?

Oh, my goodness.

Why am I so concerned? Because I never had friends so precious like them before?

I shouldn't be so worried. Worried, worried, worried...

Next time; There won't be a next time.

I actually need to get out and take some interesting photos for this blog. Thing is, I don't. Poor lonely camera of mine. Poor utterly plain blog of mine.

Heh.

Filler post? Indeed.

I don't care what you say but I LOVE Eminem's rapping in Love The Way You Lie. (:

#5

Thank you,

Dearest Jay Lyn, Rachel, Kavina and Joanne (: You are indeed the best people to fall sick with. I've never felt so unwell and yet laughed until I nearly teared up. Truly children of the heavens (quote Jay Lyn). You're all, most undeniably, *cue Jay Lyn's voice*, the bomb.

(:

Done transferring the past thank-you posts from my other blog to this one ! (:

#4

SATURDAY, APRIL 03, 2010

Thank you,

Isaac H. George, for being the perfect definition of a friend; to another incredible person i know. Whether or not your support is shown outwardly, know that I will be forever grateful. Thank heavens for being placed in this same box of a classroom in January 2010. There are not many like you, that I can certify... (:

#3

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 09, 2010

Thank you,

Sue Ann, Rachel Matthews, Lih Wen, Tammy, Phui Yuk, Kell Jim, Oliviaand Hanrick for your sincere concern over my transport back home today. It's amazing to know just after a month of hanging around in college, I have met exemplars of worthy friends. And most of all to Arvind, for the security throughout the taxi-ride.

(:

#2

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 09, 2010

Thank you,

Helpful-guy-whose-name-I-have-yet-to-find-out for picking up all my coins when they fell and were scattered all over the school canteen floor (2009). I did not realize until you held out your hand, filled with silver; that you had taken the trouble to pick every single one as you did so behind the blue tables, and walked away so rather quickly for me to not have expressed proper gratitude.

(: